“What’s wrong?” can be one of the hardest phrases to answer. For some, nothing and everything is wrong all at once.
Today I was introduced to the Semicolon Project when browsing through Facebook. The concept is to draw a semicolon on your wrist today in honor of anyone who suffers from depression, self-harm, suicidal thoughts, anxiety, a broken heart, unhappiness, or other related struggles. The grammatical character represents that a sentence could have been ended, but the author chose not to, metaphorically relating the author as the individual and the sentence to life. Essentially, the project symbolizes moving forward through pain, and it couldn’t have come at a more appropriate time.
It’s probably not the best decision for me to completely expose myself to a sea of strangers known as the Internet, but I’d like to think that honesty is the best strategy in any situation. With that being said, I’m definitely feeling the Semicolon Project. While I don’t feel suicidal, I won’t hesitate to say that I’ve faced my fair share of emotional struggles.
Something that definitely plagues me is feeling “good enough.” Whether it’s for a certain project or person or whatever, sometimes I (and I’m sure plenty of others) don’t feel adequate or worthy. This feeling of insecurity is often a result of rejection, which I’m definitely familiar with. It’s likely that I am completely inept to any sort of romantic relationship. This doesn’t usually bother me, but rejection still stings. No one enjoys being told, “I had a lot of fun last time, but I’ve been talking to someone for a while and probably shouldn’t hook up with anyone else,” or something along those lines. But what truly gets to me is professional rejection. I’m somewhat of a perfectionist when it comes to my professional endeavors, and my greatest fear is failure. I always blame myself when I don’t receive the call or email I wait for from a potential employer. Of course, the frenzy of emotions can be overwhelming, sending me into a state of anxiety. Everything pauses while I think into a situation with copious detail and envelope myself in stress.
Sorry if you think I’m a little crazy, and sorry for turning this into some kind of diary entry. What I’m trying to explain is that we all have our struggles, and we all need love and support. Especially regarding the recent events that have ravaged Boston, bolstering a friend or family member’s spirit when they are unhappy is one of the most powerful acts. You never know when someone is hurting, and we need to always reach out and show that we care for others. The best forms of artwork and expression come from a sense of longing and melancholy, yet the beauty cannot be exposed if our fellow people are left in the dark.
It’s been an emotional couple of days here in Boston, but the theme of the Semicolon Project must continue past this. Possibly the hardest part of dealing with these issues is accepting self-love. In order to move forward and help others, we need to love ourselves.
I know I’m starting to ramble here, and I apologize for all of the negative themes in the recent posts. In conclusion, we need to remember that we’re often put in awful situations that put us directly on the path where we belong. In light of all that’s been going on and all of the emotions we regularly feel, continue to share positivity and affection as much as possible.
I’ve been talking a lot about moving forward, which is essential to dealing with any unfortunate situation. And now, after all of these emotional posts, it’s time to proceed and stay positive. Let’s get back to the fashion.